


No Knight in Shining Armor

by 27summer



Category: Glee
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-17
Updated: 2017-04-17
Packaged: 2018-10-20 04:26:26
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,645
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10654884
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/27summer/pseuds/27summer
Summary: Rachel confronts Finn after his fight with Brody. Post 4x16 Feud.





	No Knight in Shining Armor

**Author's Note:**

> Originally written in March 2013. I'm moving my stuff over from LJ.

Rachel pounded on the hotel door, her anger growing as she had to wait for the door to open. She’d tried to keep calm. She wanted to be rational about this but she just couldn’t. She was angry. She knew she was a mess but she could figure it out herself. She didn’t need someone else to interfere. Not Santana, not Kurt, not- “Finn.”

“Rachel. Hey.” Finn stepped back as he opened the door, a smile flitting across his face. “Come in.”

“Don’t. Just don’t.” Rachel shoved past him. “What the hell is wrong with you?”

“What- what do you mean?” Finn asked, shutting the door behind him.

Rachel took a deep breath, trying to keep from slapping him. That cute, befuddled, innocent look on his face no longer seemed so cute. It just infuriated her. “Brody. You beat up Brody. You busted your way into New York and took it upon yourself to tell my boyfriend to never see me again.”

“No, it’s not like that,” Finn sputtered, making his way towards her. “You don’t know what he’s been doing.”

“Yeah, I do. When I saw his face, I asked him and he told me. Everything.”

Finn narrowed his eyes. “He told you he’s a hooker?”

“He did.” Rachel sighed. “Look, Brody’s not why I’m here. I want to talk about you and why you thought it was appropriate to nose your way into my life.”

“So Brody’s whoring his way through New York and you don’t care? What is wrong with you, Rachel?” He demanded.

“Brody and my relationship is between us. It’s none of your business. I talked to him earlier and I’m sure we’ll talk some more later. But that’s not important. Why are you here, Finn?” She asked.

“Because I love you. Santana called and-”

“Santana never should have called you.”

“You wouldn’t listen to her and she was worried about you. And so am I, if you’re okay with a hooker boyfriend.” Finn walked closer to her and tried to take her hands, but she yanked them away.

“Don’t. Just don’t.” Rachel scrubbed her hands over her face before looking up at him. “What did you expect would happen? That I would be so thrilled that you beat up my boyfriend that I would fall into your arms?”

“Yes! Or, I don’t know. I’m just worried about you. You’ve changed, Rach.” Finn reached out to touch her again. “Please, tell me what’s going on with you.”

Rachel shook her head stubbornly. “No. My life stopped being any of your business when you put me on a train instead of marrying me.”

“I did that for you!”

“You did, but-” Rachel blew out a breath as she tried to form the words that would make him understand. “But we aren’t together anymore. And that was your choice. Both times.”

Finn backed up, shaking his head rapidly. “Why are you blaming me? I wanted what’s best for you and- and I’m worse than a prostitute?”

 

“No, you don’t get to turn this around. That is not the point. That’s what I’m trying to make you understand.” Rachel sat down on the bed. “I know I’m not explaining this right. I don’t know what to say to you.”

“Say you’ll stay away from Brody.” Finn knelt down on the floor next to the bed and looked up at Rachel earnestly. “Please. Say that you’ll be smart and stay safe so what we can get married someday.”

Rachel gazed at his face and listened to his heartfelt plea, but she felt nothing except exasperation still. She loved him but there was no way they could be together. She wished he could say something that could make it better for them. Something that could make everything go back to the way it was. But there was nothing either of them could do. They had both changed too much and there was too much baggage there to start over. “You can‘t say things like.”

“But I mean it. I love you, Rachel. I want us to get married someday.” Finn took one of her hands in his own. “I know you love me, too.”

“I do. Maybe- maybe I always will. But I can’t live like this anymore. This in between thing where we’re not together but you butt into my life. It’s- it’s not healthy, Finn.” Rachel squeezed his hand back.

“I love you,” Finn repeated. “That should be all that matters.”

Rachel bit her lip and tugged her hand back. She reached over to him and cupped his face. “But it’s not. If we were really ready to be married, we would be.”

“I already told you why I couldn’t marry you.”

“I know.” Rachel nodded. “And you were right. We had no business getting married. We hadn’t discussed money or plans or anything like that. I‘m where I need to be and you should figure out what you want.”

“I’m not saying now. But you know we’ll get married someday, Rach. That’s why I want to protect you,” Finn pleaded, looking into her eyes.

“We’re not together right now. And we may never be again. You can’t do this. I need to live my own life without you rushing here to save me. You aren’t my husband and you’re not my father.” Rachel stood up, needing to put a little distance between them.

“Rachel-”

“No, listen. You’re the one that put me on a train here. And you’re the one who took off in the middle of the night without a word. That means that we are broken up. I don’t owe you an explanation for my actions. I am an adult, Finn. We’ve had this conversation before but you still don’t seem to get it. You decided this. You put us on this path. We can’t go back.” Rachel sighed. “Do you understand what I’m saying?”

“You’re saying I’m not supposed to care about you anymore. I don’t know how to do that.” Finn shifted restlessly on his feet. “I don’t want to stop caring about you.”

 

“That’s not what I meant.” Rachel groaned. She was so sick of talking about this. She just wanted him to understand. To know what she meant without her having to explain. But things didn’t work like that between them anymore.”

“What do you mean, then? Because I don’t get it.”

“I love you. There’s a part of me that will probably always love you. But we aren’t together anymore. And we might not ever be again.” Rachel held her hand out when he started to speak again. “Maybe we will be but I don’t know that for sure.”

“I do. I’m sure, Rach,” he stated. “I won’t stop believing that.”

Rachel shrugged her shoulders. “I can’t stop you. But I think you were right when you said we should keep our distance from each other. No phone calls, no visits, no sex. This- this thing we’re doing isn’t healthy and I don’t want to do it anymore.”

“We- we can’t stay away from each other. That’s the point. We’re meant to be.”

“Someday, but not now. We aren’t together and I want a chance to figure out who I am without you rushing in every time something happens,” she said, reaching out to take his hands. “We both need this time. You know I’m right.”

“So what do we do?” Finn asked, a lost look on his face.

“I- I’m not sure.” Rachel shook her head. “I’m in New York. I’m really happy. Despite everything, I know this is where I’m meant to be. I love it.”

“What about me?”

“That’s kind of the point. You need to find out what’s going to make you happy. If you can be happy here or somewhere else. I can’t decide that for you. And you shouldn’t force yourself to be here if you don’t really want to be. That’s not fair for either of us.” Rachel’s eyes filled with tears. “We would end up hating each other.”

Finn walked over to her, putting his hands on her shoulders. “I could never hate you.”

“I hope not.” Rachel wrapped her arms around him, resting her head on his chest. She had a feeling this would be the last time she did this for a while so she wanted to savor it. “You’re my first love.”

“I love you so much.” Finn ran his hands over her back. “I wish I knew how to fix this. I wish we could be together.”

“Me, too.” She pulled back, wiping at her eyes.

“What now?”

Rachel gazed up at him. “I leave. And you go where ever you’re going to go. And we move on with our lives.”

“What about Brody?” He couldn’t help but ask.

“I figure out what to do about Brody without your help. I don’t need it. I’m grown woman who can take care of myself. I don’t need you to save me,” Rachel replied impatiently. She’d thought he had understood and wouldn’t push anymore. She didn’t want to start an argument when it was time for her to leave.

Finn shook his head. “I don’t like this.”

“I know, but you don’t have to like it. This is my life.” Rachel leaned up and kissed him softly on the lips. “Good bye, Finn.”

“Bye.” Finn lifted his hand in a useless wave as he watched her turn and walk out of his hotel room.

Rachel made her way outside before she collapsed against the building. There was still a heavy wait on her chest but she still somehow felt better. She may not know what she’s doing but she’d settle things with Finn. At least for now. Maybe now she could figure out what exactly she wanted without someone else interfering. She could run her own life and any mistakes she made would be hers.


End file.
